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Marriage: a definition
Marriage as defined by Webster's Dictionary:
The institution whereby men and women are joined in a special kind of social and legal dependence for the purpose of founding and maintaining a family.
This definition seems about right to most of us. We've all heard of marriage, most of us are the product of it, and a fair number of us will go through it ourselves, at least once. We see it as nothing more than the drab economic contract described above, and although some of us enter into it with high hopes for the future, romance generally fizzles in the first few years, leaving us with a swing set in the backyard and a minivan in the driveway but little or no romantic fulfillment. Right?
Wrong.
The main problem with the above definition is that nowhere does it define the heart of the institution. It says nothing about love or sex, about lifetime commitment to the person whom you admire most, about a voluntary and equal relationship between two people who choose to live their lives as a married couple.
Marriage doesn't have to be about drudgery, about forced partnership for life, about the death of romance and sexual fulfillment. The fact that some couples allow it to become so doesn't detract from its real purpose.
I define it as follows:
A sexually exclusive and equitable love relationship entered into voluntarily by two adults, solemnized by vows and recognized by themselves and others as the highest romantic achievement possible between two people.
Perhaps these ideas are relatively new and unheard of; perhaps it is old wisdom well known by our grandparents but never articulated in our generation. Regardless, we are in dire need of some direction on this subject.
The following web pages will illustrate the principles involved, theories that I have developed, and observations I have made. Marriage is a joyful, wonderful adventure shared by two people, one that need never fade. It is the "happily ever after" the fairy tales always promised. I hope you enjoy the site.
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